


Rosemary goes to Taco Bell

by FunkMcLovin



Category: Homestuck
Genre: F/F, Gay, Lesbians, Memes, Taco Bell
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-13
Updated: 2020-07-13
Packaged: 2021-03-04 20:21:51
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 860
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25232317
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FunkMcLovin/pseuds/FunkMcLovin
Summary: Just what it says on the tin. This was voted on by the fans onmy twitter
Relationships: Rose Lalonde/Kanaya Maryam
Comments: 3
Kudos: 25





	Rosemary goes to Taco Bell

The door to the Taco Bell swung open. The air in the facility seemed to freeze in that moment, as the patrons looked up with quirked brows to see them.

Rose Lalonde and Kanaya Maryam, two goddessess, two literal gods of the planet, had just strode through the doorway. Adults hushed their excited children. The staff paused to look, before hastily returning to work. Rose put her hands on her hips, opening her mouth to speak to her wife.

"Capitalism is alive and well on Earth C, I see."

Rose and Kanaya approached the cash register, behind which a pubescent teen boy stood, eyes wide, shoulders drawn narrow. Rose rubbed her chin, musing over the menu. Kanaya crossed her arms, doing the same in a far more perplexed manner.

"I have never heard of most of these foods, Rose," she said, a little nervous. The boy gulped. He prayed they didn't ask him for any reccommendations, it was his first day! Luckily for him, Rose seemed to know what Kanaya would prefer.

"Don't worry, Kanaya, we'll get you squared away," Rose said, rubbing Kanaya's back reassuringly. Kanaya smiled, relieved. The interaction wasn't unlike a teacher reassuring a student about a difficult school subject. Rose turned to the boy, luckily paying him little heed as she pointed at menu items. "We'll have the two chalupa with a hard taco meal, as well as two beefy nacho grillers. And a beefy five-layer burrito without the beans."

"Ah, wonderful. I hate beans," Kanaya said.

"And one large drink. To share," Rose finished, with a dreamy, doe-eyed sort of gaze at her wife.

In this interaction, Rose clearly wore the proverbial pants. Kanaya looked borderline fearful, afraid to approach the man behind the cash register, not because of any social anxiety, but because of her own inexperience with the menu. The boy was eased by the shared nervousness, and nodded hastily, punching in their order, reciting their total.

"You can pick the drink, Kanaya," Rose said, handing off the large graphic-printed transparent cup to her wife. Kanaya took it with gusto, as though Rose had entrusted her with some kind of important quest. She traipsed to the drink despenser, glad that it did not have a cashier who could judge her for her indecision.

By the time Kanaya selected the beverage, Rose had a tray of food. They sat down together at a remote booth, wishing to avoid any interaction with the various patrons. They weren't in the mood for speaking to fans at the moment. Thankfully, everyone ate peacefully, leaving Rose and her wife alone.

"Rose," said Kanaya, her eyes lighting up as she took a sip of the cyan-colored soft drink in her manicured hands. "You HAVE to try this sharp water. It's exquisite."

Rose snorted.

"Baja blast? Don't drink too much soda, darling, you won't be decent to drive us home."

Kanaya wisely set the glass down, pacing herself, already feeling the intoxicating effects of carbonation on her troll biology. She selected her beefy five-layer burrito and bit into it.

"How is the food, dear?" Rose asked, daintily chewing one of the chalupas, taking a sip of the blue drink. When she looked up from the straw, however, Kanaya's face was downcast. "What's wrong?"

"Oh! Nothing, my love," Kanaya said, hesitantly.

"Is the food that bad? I'm sorry, darling. I know it's not the best quality, but it's the only stop on the way home."

"No, no, it's not that, it's just. A small matter, really," Kanaya stammered, embarrassed. Rose took Kanaya's wrist, peeking at the inside of the bitten-off burrito. Rose scowled.

"Beans," she said, standing up, the plastic chair skidding across the tile floor.

"Rose, it is really no big deal, I will just have one of the grillers," Kanaya insisted, halfheartedly. But Rose would not be swayed. She marched to the cash register, the same crater-faced teen holding up his hands like Rose was holding a pistol.

"What is the meaning of this?" Asked the diminutive blonde. Kanaya held back, standing behind Rose sheepishly. It would have been a comical sight to the boy, a dainty blonde speaking for a troll nearly twice her height and mass. Kanaya looked like she could bench-press two cars, but here Rose was, crusading for her right to have a beanless burrito.

"W-we at Taco Bell are happy to re-make any unsatisfactory food product-" the boy stammered, defaulting to the trained phrasing of the Crocker Corp Taco Bell Training Manual.

"You ought to," said Rose with a coldness that didn't befit the minor flub. "My wife thanks you." She finished, satisfied with the boy's reverence. "Are they paying you enough, here, young man?"

The boy was taken off-guard by the question. He looked from Rose to his manager, who was helping the drive-thru.

"N-no, miss," he admitted. To this, Rose withdrew her purse, sliding a few bills his way.

"Buy yourself a suit and get a better job," Rose said, before returning to her table with Kanaya.

After Kanaya had eaten her beanless burrito, Rose and her wife exited into the bright sun. It was a good day to be a goddess.


End file.
